Friday, May 10, 2013
Tuesday March 5th was to be the day. So many emotions leading up to this day, it is hard to be both happy and sad at the same time. Earlier in the week I had packed up all of Turtle's clothes and toys that he was taking with him and gave them to his mom. I didn't want to be doing all that on the actual day that he left. The last thing I wanted to do was say goodbye to him and then come home to an empty house and start putting away all the baby things, I knew I needed a distraction and what better way to do that than plan a family vacation to the happiest place on earth! Honestly part of me was really looking forward to taking a break and packing and preparing a family of 9 to go on vacation was overwhelming in itself and definitely gave me something else to focus on. Turtle's adoptive mom was running late the morning she was to pick him up so we ran some last minute errands. When we got home there were 2 frantic messages an an email from his caseworker saying we couldn't move him! At this point I was so over all of this, we had said our goodbyes, everything of his had been moved, and honestly we were just done. I called my licensing agency who has been amazing in supporting and advocating for us, the director called the cps supervisor and ripped her a new one which made us feel awesome! Long story short, Turtle is still with us while we wait for his family to be certified to adopt. We are doing visits back and forth, his family is taking him for longer stretches of time and not only when it's "convenient" for them. We have built a really great relationship with them and we are excited to watch not only Turtle, but his siblings grow up as well. This process has been emotionally draining. It is not easy sharing the boy you love knowing that one day he won't be yours at all. At times it has been messy and ugly and not at all fun but I absolutely love these kids that I get to call mine, even for a little while and yes, I would do it all over again.