Two

Two more days until the fate of our sweet boy is determined. Mr. Caseworker just came by for his monthly visit, he was 10 minutes early in fact! Despite the fact that he forgot about last weeks visit I still really like him. We talked for awhile about what could possibly happen at court on Wednesday. Unlike Drummer's caseworker, he is very open and shared quite a bit with me. Apparently the judge assigned to Turtle's case is the most pro-bio family judge in the county. Great. Not what I was hoping for. Turtle's paternal grandma passed the home study but only marginally, she is dependent on the state to meet her financial needs. I know that she is family but she has never seen him, she has no relationship with him and he's about to be a year old. I also found out that she didn't even raise Turtle's father, he grew up in group homes himself. It breaks my heart knowing that there is a strong possibility that he will be placed with her. I could tell that Mr. Caseworker really loves this little boy. He has been his case manager since birth and has watched him grow up. I am glad that he came to see us, he admitted that he was initially against Turtle being moved from his first home, but now that he has seen him and the progress he has made in just the past month he is happy for him. He kept saying how much he's changed, that there is a 110% difference in what he can now do. He just sat here for awhile watching him play, not really saying anything. I think he was actually a little emotional! So sweet that there are people in the system that do love these kids and they become attached to them too. The next few days will be hard, I don't even know if he is leaving but just thinking about it I get a huge lump in my throat. It just stinks that this little boy has been through so much already, he needs a family. I  hope that the judge will see that and give our little Turtle a chance to have a life full of love and happiness.

By the way, I managed to keep my house clean all week for todays visit. I even scrubbed my scary bathroom! My daughter's room is still a mess (she's grounded until it gets cleaned!) and the playroom is beyond help but it didn't matter because he never looked around! I know the one time that I throw caution to the wind and my house is a disaster will be the time someone decides to check in all the rooms! In all honesty it's never really that bad,  last week was just a little crazy and it got the best of me!